Losing Touch

It seems that my most recent posts have all been drastic attempts to "catch up" with the happenings of my life. Turns out that as I laid wide awake in bed til 4:30 A.M. on Sunday-- I felt like I've been slowly losing touch of so many things that made my life so fulfilling and balanced. I've been sick this past week and while purging my body of viruses and bacteria-- I've also managed to gain clarity in that I've realized that I no longer maintain my blog as current as I use to, I've neglected going to the gym, completely stopped going to yoga, going to bed early, finding cooking relaxing and finding a happy medium between work and life. Could it be that my lack of attention and discipline that I was so proud of just a few months ago was the leading cause of me falling sick this past week? It's hard to say, but the truth is that I've missed coming to my blog for peace of mind, I've missed the calming of working out and yoga and the total body/mind transformation that comes with it. I really feel like I've lost touch with my body and mind...all I seem to want to do is sleep. I've felt mindless, bored and quite frankly cashed out these past few weeks. A lot has picked up with work, but my personal life seems to have remained the same. I've enjoyed some outings with my good friends DB and DP, caught up with old friends KM and MS, and I've even somehow managed to rekindle a friendship (emphasis on friendship) with my ex-gf LH.

I don't know where my mind has been, but I want to get back to the focus and discipline I once had. I'd managed to make a regimen for myself with work, gym and life that was rewardings on so many levels. Could it be that the purchase of my television has been the cause of all this destruction? Could it be that I've reverted to my old lazy and comfortable self and fallen victim to the spell of having the tube in my bedroom? I'd like to think not, but it seems that way as ridiculous as that may seem. I use to be so productive and spent a lot of time focused on myself and improving both body and mind....as mentioned above...where has all that gone?

So where to stand now? Well, as busy as my work schedule has been these last few weeks, I've begun reclaiming my full hour of lunch-- allotting my time to blog. I'm also still recovering from this nasty bug that has kept me in and out of work since last thursday. It was strange in that I felt terrible one day, fine the next, fell ill again and wake up fine the next...a rollercoaster of fever and cold. I'm giving my body time to regain some energy before hitting the gym again, but I can't tell you how much I'm actually craving a yoga session. There's still a lot that needs to be done to my apartment before it is in any condition to host the slew of friends and family I have coming to visit the next two months, but I'm making steps to getting it to a comfortable/affordable level. My apartment is slowly starting to feel like home despite having lived there for 2 months. My work has been chaotic. I find myself getting there early, leaving late and having no time to actually think through some of my projects. I've realized that while I know what I'm doing on some of my tasks....I don't really understand anything that I'm doing, which worries me a bit, but it really comes down to taking the time to think through it. I don't have the time for that---haha.

Last weekend I enjoyed a fantastic New York night out with DB and DP. After a hectic journey through Manhattan that began with brunch in the E. Village, a pit stop at consignment shop Tokyo 7, a lunatic cabbie that purposefully backed into another cab that had re-ended us in the middle of SoHo and an unimaginably long car ride over the Brooklyn Bridge through Times Square....we finally arrived at the "Of Montreal" concert to catch the last pieces of their opening act. The concert was an excitingly thrillful spectacle. The band was energetic and gave a performance unlike anything I'd ever seen...afterwhich we headed to the W. Village for a few pies of pizza. All in all, the night was, for lack of a better word, awesome. Good music, good food, good people....its exactly what I want to constantly surround myself with. My mantra if you will.

It's good to be back.