D. It was written

It is time to bid farewell to 2008. A year filled with so many remarkable milestones and certainly a year I will look back upon and smile. To briefly recount my achievements in no particular order. I was promoted to Account Executive at work. I moved into a one bedroom studio apartment in Manhattan. I entered a new salary bracket. I inched one year closer to 25. I enlarged my core circle of friends to include JH, MM, AB, MH, CA, and AM. I paid off my credit cards. I maintained significant headway in my personal life. I began steering my career in a more desirable direction. I've maintained those friendships most important to me. I have kept my family close despite the long distance. I have began building my home piece by piece. I have been consistently happy, albeit reflective throughout the year. I have remained optimistic in the face of "adversity." I have become smitten with few individuals, while only feeling the burn of one or two. I have proven that you can work hard and play just as hard. I have managed to save and build my 401(k). 

When I look back at 2008 it will always be a year of transition. It will be the year that I moved to Manhattan, really began to understand the affects city life has on me personally, psychologically and emotionally, and started to piece together the adult I am becoming. At this juncture in my life I am happy and never sad. I have come to accept the reality of many situations, embrace uncertainty and continue to accept change. I maintain a positive outlook on possibilities and opportunities, and I have come to appreciate the moments in my life that make you feel most alive. 

For 2009...I will not commit to resolve any detail of my daily life by making empty promises to myself. Rather, I will focus on enhancing the core values I have begun to nourish through my relationships with friends, family and acquaintances. I will work a little harder to further my career. I will open myself up to the possibilities of new relationships. I will work to maintain a healthy balance in all quadrants of my life. I would like to shake uncertainty, insecurity and indecisiveness. More than anything, my wish for 2009 is to continue to learn about the complexity that is me. There is still so much left to unravel and with every layer (so to speak), I find it gets more and more interesting to learn the make up of one's inner self. 

I'm throwing caution to the wind this year, and I could not be more excited to see what lies ahead. It was written. 

I Am The Decisive Element

The last couple of weeks have been a philosophical trial challenging my habitual desire to control everything. As I have begun to let the pieces fall where they may, I am learning that my happiness lies not in what is to come, but what is currently in front of me. I have alleviated myself of the burden of expectation and replaced it with a willingness to just be and go.

And now a quote that sums it up best:

"I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming."

-Goethe

The Philosophy that is Dru

I was born in Colombia. I am stubborn. I can be pretentious with my music. I have expensive taste. I am an evolving foodie. I am stronger than I look. I am a very amateur photographer. I enjoy movies I can watch more than once. I write to keep me sane. I am a cook when the mood strikes me. I will travel several blocks for a tastey cup of coffee. I am not afraid of living alone. I am Jewish by association. I dance when the right song is playing.

I believe clothes make the man. I have been bitten by the travel bug. I have some OCD-like qualities people may find bizarre. I am sarcastic. I like to think about life. I wish I was a little bit taller, but I don't wish I was a baller. I am a pop culture junky. I sometimes wonder if I am doing all I can. I pick my friends carefully. I don't believe that my occupation defines me. I am a morning person. I like interpreting art. I think Dante's Inferno is fantastic. I sometimes double book myself.

I enjoy outdoor activities. I am ambitious. I love using my creativity. I am tougher than most. I have learned to embrace change. I enjoy a good bottle of Spanish red wine. I walk aimlessly when I am bored. I am comfortable in silence. I like meeting new people. I have never been to a movie alone. I wear my shoes with no socks. I think playing "Taboo" with close friends can be a raucous. I like the colors blue, charcoal and brown. I will retire in Cape Cod. I aspire to be in the Entertainment industry. I get heart burn from soda and pizza. I wear glasses only to read. I can eat anything made of chocolate. I rock a faux hawk. I always try to keep it classy.

I have been told that I am wise beyond my years. I love brunch on the weekends. I wish I could shower with my iPod. I can't vote. I can only read when I am motivated. I like cold weather. I plan to live abroad before I am 30. I can be a great friend. I have learned to pick my battles. I am my family's golden child. I prefer creamy peanut butter over crunchy. I have only completed one power hour in my life. I shower up to two times a day. I think spelling drunk, DRUnk is witty. I think tie clips are daper. I am not a fan of sloppy P.D.A. I can be rambunctious. I like magazines. I love living in the Lower East Side. I have never been to the top of a mountain. I am not afraid of confrontation, but I am not violent. I have a problem being micro-managed.

I was a child actor. I am teaching myself to save. I am observant. I enjoy speaking Spanish. I want a tattoo of the word S.E.R.A. I like movies told out of sequence. I enjoy camping. I unplug all my appliances before leaving my apartment. I believe you can succeed without being malicious. I have never met my biological mother. I jog to clear my head. I have never played in the snow. I became a football fan solely because of the Florida Gators. I drink water only because it is recommended. I have a lot of endurance. I am an early adopter techie. I am afraid my teeth will turn yellow from all the coffee I drink. I value people who can be forward with me. I have a fast metabolism. I pay attention to the details. I want to open a coffee shop someday. I've gotten stitches once. I think I stunted my growth by drinking coffee at an early age. I am a leader, not a follower.

I consider myself a liberal. I think anything with bacon tastes amazing. I would love to scuba dive off the Great Barrier Reef. I like drinking games traditionally reserved for college kids. I secretly hate facebook. I have not lost a close relative, thankfully. I believe spooning should be reserved for the cold winter months. I am a fan of seersucker, argyle and "Mr. Roger" sweaters. I dream of owning an Aston Martin. I believe the Blackberry and iPhone have corrupted social interaction. I own an iPhone. I like the taste of Red Bull.

I am ecclectic. I would get plastic surgery to pin my ears back a bit. I can never say no to a happy hour. I am a bit of a procrastinator. I like driving with the windows down. I do yoga on Tuesdays. I like that my birthday is in December. I think everything sounds better when you have an accent. I have a lot of self control. I have a dry sense of humor. I played tennis, soccer and roller hockey growing up. I am short tempered. I believe that love finds you. I don't like when people mispronounce my real name. I can be frugal.

I nap even when I wake up at noon. I have never been to the West coast. I am fearful of the "reply all" button on my work E-mail. I never presume anything. I rarely carry cash. I want to bunge jump off a bridge. I dreamt of becoming a movie director. I give a lot, but expect a lot in return. I can be over analytical. I avoid thinking about tomorrow to the best of my ability. I think London's Tube beats New York's Subway. I am not hypocritical, but I will call you out. I am oddly methodical when I brush my teeth. I do not have a strong position on Evolution.

I don't believe in putting all of my eggs in one basket. I have a fear of heights, but would love to sky dive. I believe in mind of matter. I was voted "best dressed" in high school. I want to open my own PR agency one day. I am not friendly with any of my ex-girlfriends. I could eat breakfast any time of day. I don't understand people with foot phobias. I've only been in love once. I often ponder the existential. I like going out on Thursday nights. I am a rollercoaster enthusiast.

I had a gym membership, but hardly went and when I don't have a gym membership, I crave the gym. I want to expand my vocabulary. I hate when I lose my chapstick in the winter. I believe ambience is very important. I don't believe that mixing beer and liquor makes you sicker. I have had my heart broken once. I don't believe in the after life. I like the sound of horse hooves on cobble stone streets. I never went to sleep away camp. I eat very slowly. I sometimes forget to filter my thoughts before I speak. I like watching reality shows. I like the numbers 2 and 6, but I couldn't give you a reason why. I could never date a smoker, and I hate the smell of cigarettes. I want a Pug. I find "first-kiss" tension thrilling. I can sometimes come on a little strong. I think I would be good at skiing despite never trying.

I have never had braces. I was the only child for 13 years. I could never live in middle America. I take pride in the work that I do. I like red velvet cupcakes with chocolate frosting. I am working to eliminate all negativity from my life. I don't believe in waking up on the wrong side of the bed. I believe religion is something you find for yourself and not inherited. I listen to my music loudly. I don't gamble. I prefer brunettes over blondes. I don't like people with a false sense of entitlement. I act spontaneously. I have only dated Jewish women, coincidentally.

I am sometimes cliche. I am not ambidextrous, but I can turn left. I try to avoid restaurants with more than 3 locations in Manhattan. I want to learn to play the guitar. I have never understood writing people completely out of your life after dating. I am not superstitious. I sometimes feel like I have A.D.H.D. I prefer bars over clubs. I look up to my grandfather. I want to learn to sail. I will not order the same thing as someone at the table. I have been known to dance on chairs when "Summer of '69" comes on. I worked at Banana Republic in high school.

I am an open book. I don't mind sharing. I am inspired by people with interesting perspectives and opinions. I don't do well with flakiness or hesitation. I believe in going after something you want, respectfully. I never want to regret. I don't really believe in medicine. I will always feel younger than my age. I believe you have to adjust for the curves in the road. I believe beauty fades without some substance behind it.

I have never been of the mindset to deny myself of an experience out of the fear of uncertainty. I will try anything once before deciding it is not for me. I am generally always happy, but I have my days.

The First Snow Fall

In my second winter in New York, I remain hopeful to the possibility of a blizzardous snowfall over Manhattan. I've been told it could happen, but I have yet to experience it for myself. Tonight the blankets of white snowy powder have begun to mask the otherwise defiled city streets. No matter how old you get, I believe the first snow fall of the season will always be something mystic. 

The city gets quiet. The air fills with white snow flakes and it is as though for almost a second everything around you is wholesome. All the cars look like miniaturized snow hills when lined up along the sidewalks. The side walks shimmer with the gleam of the melted snow flakes and the hardened icy spots. Even the sterile black bags of garbage that line the streets for tomorrow's pick up take adopt this delicate role as the snow piles atop and in between its every wrinkle. They almost look like cupcakes. The bench outside of Tiny's Giant Sandwich shop that goes unnoticed as you pass it every day to and from the train suddenly catches your eye. 

From way up high it's like New Year's confetti falling from the highest skyscraper. The cold, wet snow stings your cold skin. The snowflakes cling to your wool coat like little soap suds. With every step the snow flakes that fall-- dissolve on the ground beneath you. Peering down there remains not a trace of the snow that makes every object around you look pure, untouched and beautiful. 

I am still patiently waiting for my chance to build my Frosty. Throw my first snow ball. Make a snow angel and slide down Central Parks highest hill. I think what keeps the excitement of the first snow fall, and this merely speculation on my part, is its capacity to revert so many jaded (see: unimpressed) adults to a time when everything seemed easy. I think I can hold on to my excitement because after 24 years, I have yet to play (yes, play) in it. 

I remember the first time I saw it flurry. I was walking home from Sansbury in London. It never fell as much as I had wished (or nearly as much as it is falling now), but I can still picture it falling throwing the twiggy branches of the trees that lined Byng Place. I equated the very moment to the cover of an old record you'd find in a vintage record shop long forgotten. 

Even after a 12 hour work day (today). It's hard to walk out at 8:45 p.m. in Midtown and not be anything but happy. 

It's snowing...

To 24

Another year older.  Another year --- wiser? Maybe not wiser, but certainly more reflective. As if I haven't delved into my inner self enough these last couple of posts and turned my (mis)adventures and  journeys in New York and London into a LiveJournal.

The 24th Birthday certainly felt different. At least I had hoped it would be different. I was looking forward to celebrating in a truly classy fashion. To some extent I did, but naturally the pre-party killed it for me. On Dec. 10th, a co-worker won a free open bar from 6-7 p.m. which to me translated into drink as many jack and cokes as humanely possible within that hour because they are free. Oh and don't have dinner because that would just kill your buzz. Five hours later and still 23 years old, I find myself in a position that equate too well with all birthdays past--- hovering over the toilet bowl and tasting the jack and cokes for the second time. 

That set the tone for the rest of my birthday. I couldn't make it to work. I couldn't eat all day. I sat on my couch and watched movies all day. Luckily, the day was gloomy and rainy so I wasn't missing out on much, but the sheer fact that I felt bedridden killed it for me. Not to mention that I thought I'd be a bit more of an adult at 24 that I wouldn't drive myself to that point. In all fairness, I was still 23 and stupid when it happened-- so I can't really beat myself up too badly.

Conversely, I had made dinner reservations at Lavagna for 8 p.m. The place is known for its  homestyle Italian cuisine. It's a quaint little place lit by candles and garnished with the subtleties that make an establishment feel warm and intimate. We sat at the only round table in the restaurant. There were six of us. This year I had decided to keep the number way down from the 18 or so I had attend last year. I wanted to keep it close with good friends. 

In attendance were my oldest friend of the bunch MS, my old London bloke CM and gf MH, my confidant JH and newest rock climbing partner MM. A solid group of folk who made the conversation easy, appreciated the food and made 24 exactly what I wanted it to be complete with an assortment of Crumbs cupcakes for our eating pleasure thanks to MM. 

There's no question that tacking on another year to one's life is a cause for re-evaluating your current state. At least in my eyes it means taking a step back and visualizing where it was I thought I'd be at this age and how drastically different my life has really turned out to be. Looking around the table last night, I realized that I've had an incredible journey the last two years living in New York. Mainly because I was surrounded by friends both new and old. To me the greatest testament to any journey is looking at the people you've picked up along the way. I've kept true to my goal of only surround myself with positive people who fulfill my life. 

I have high hopes for 24. I think it'll be a successful year for me not unlike 23 was. For my sake, I hope it brings me more clarity and perspective into the direction I continue in. Perhaps the greatest thing of all though is that no matter how fast the years have gone by since 18 (really I can't even believe its been 6 years already) I still feel very young. 

I know there is so much left for me to learn. Here's to hoping that 24 continues to teach me about love, life and that relentless quest for happiness. Here's to 24.